I was writing in my prayer journal this weekend, and I was speechless. I’ve stated my desires in my journal, fought with my weaknesses with Jesus, prayed thanks for a great deal in my life, and I just didn’t know what to write. When this happens, I recommend you not close up and move on, but take a moment and let your heart and mind think on Jesus. For me, so far, taking a silent moment to focus on Jesus leads me back to pen and paper and a deeper focus on my desire, Jesus. Some minutes later, a smile came on my face with a thought of amusement, and I wrote, ‘I want to hear you (Jesus) laugh.’

Every man, every woman, has their rough day that we hope doesn’t roll into weeks. I’ve been rolling in the deep for a little bit now myself. Life is not something that is meant to be easy. I know this. For me and my strife it is a need to trust God on one side, a fear of failing my family on the other. The sad fact about it is I have no reason to doubt God. Yet, I am afraid that I will fail God. Failing God, I will fail my family and myself. This . . . fear, plagues me lately and I’m struggling to overcome it. Yet, sunlight pierces my deepness in such simple, complicated, blessings.

I just want a trail to follow. Jesus, please, show me your footprints, so I can know which directions to go, what turns to take, what dead ends to avoid. I’m pulling this kind of analogy from a book I turned to this morning on my Audible library. I love to have a book in my hands, but life and work make Audible a choice that allows me to research and enjoy SO many more books than I’d otherwise have time for. ‘Fathered by God’ is a book that grabbed my attention this morning; because, I have been struggling lately with what to do with my life. I have a question I’ve been asking Jesus for months now, maybe over a year, and this morning I was mentally spent on what to do and I needed Jesus to say something.

Remember Why:

I gave my life to Jesus something around 22 years ago, and I just had a speech by Inky Johnson on YouTube bring me to tears. The video was roughly half an hour long, but he said something that struck me, well he said a lot that struck me, but one that I’ll talk about here is ‘remember why.’ Remember why I went to Jesus to begin with. Funny thing is, though I think of that day once in a while, I hadn’t thought about why I went to him. I went to Jesus to be saved, yes, but what brought me to that point in the first place?

I went to Jesus because of what I was promised, love.